Haying, Church and Socialism - The biographical background 


Edyta Zaborowska was born in 1970 in a small village in Poland. After the revolution in the east she saw her chance and moved to Germany. "No one from her family or village was delighted about her plans. They asked her if she had no patriotism. “Incidentally, all those who were still talking of patriotism at that time followed me years later to the West!"


So she left Poland against the will of her social environment only with a few dollars and a small travel bag and with no knowledge of the German language. "The bus driver let me off at a motorway service station near Cologne, where I called a distant relative!"  What followed was an odyssey through camps and residential homes. She quickly learned the German language. "When you know the Polish language with seven oblique cases and the complicated grammar you can perceive the German language very easily!"


A life full of changes and professional reorientations followed. After great misfortunes, there were phases of resignation and despair. In these troubled times the musical talent gave her sustenance and security, to which she resorted to when things ran really bad once again. "A little more peace came into my life when I met my roommate. But there was something between us, what wasn´t compatible with my upbringing and morality. One day he had a kind of "coming out" and confessed his love of BDSM, fetish, domination and latex lingerie. Obviously, he had carried his secrets with him and didn´t dare to tell me about it, as he had too many fears of losing me. But the inclusion of these elements into the sex life was unthinkable for me, my education and past had left too many marks on me! BDSM and sexual fetishism were totally new and I did not get anything out of it. He didn´t let up and one day I took the plunge and jumped into the frigid water. That experience turned my life around and it started an avalanche that could not be stopped. I encountered the sexual power play with submission. The latex lingerie was the essential accessory for my dominance, which I began to live out more and more!"


"But this change even had an effect on my private and professional life. My time as a conservative and plain office clerk was suddenly gone. My appearance and my presence became confident and elegant, and I was propelled to a career in the management of the company. Also, I was able to come to terms with my past, because some frustrating experiences of my life still haunted me. Only now I had the power and self-confidence to get these infuriating thoughts out of the way."


Because BDSM is still often declared as "bizarre", "perverted" or "sick," she hides that passion and had always kept away from fetish subcultures; she prefers to live it undetected in the far north of Germany. The risk of professional and family exclusion would be too great. So she chose the form of an autobiographical novel. "This made it possible for me to combine reality with fiction. I could change names, places and times and build up a real tension, some scenes I could weaken, others I could exaggerate a little bit. Also, I wanted to include a shot of mystery and a sense of humour. I have experimented and changed the narrative perspectives and times due to the situations of the story; I just have taken some liberties! "


"This is my first attempt as a writer which was not even planned. I just wanted to write a profile for an online forum, which suddenly ran completely out of control. I wrote and wrote built in more and more ideas and fictions and suddenly I had written almost two hundred pages. Obviously, it was too much for a member profile of an internet forum and I became the idea of turning it into a book. Disillusionment set in after read reports in the Internet about difficulty to find a publisher. Only with "Book on Demand" I found a publishing house, where I could risk my project."


For financial reasons, incidentally, we relinquished an expensive female model for the cover design and illustrations in the book. "For the exorbitant fee I have to sell a thousand more books. In addition, the book is so much of me that I wanted to have authentic pictures of me on the cover. So I was my own model."


"Finally I can say that I not only wanted to write about my experiences. I also want to give other women the courage to overstep one’s bounds, marked out by upbringing, marriage, experiences or home. Women do not have to be a dominatrix immediately, but I think that in every woman is living a Black Swan who wants to be woken up!"